Alas, I am (nearly) settled
I've been in Dublin for three weeks now. Oddly, it feels like I have been here for longer than that and I hope that is a good thing. Settling in to my new place, new course, and new environment has been challenging, but worth it. Though this transition has been hard so far, Dublin still feels like the place I should be. It's a perfect, rainy, welcoming place that already feels like home.
These first three weeks have absolutely been tricky and emotional. The moment I landed at the airport, the heavy weight of being away from home was upon me. A part of me just wanted to turn around and get on a flight back to America. Last summer, I didn't feel this way, because I knew I would be going home on a certain date, returning to my routines at UNH and at home. This time around, something about this move feels more daunting. In the back of my mind, a little voice is reminding me that from now on, 'going home' might mean trips no longer than a month or so, as Dublin evolves into my 'new home'. As I begin to fall into routines here, my habits and routines in New Hampshire slowly fade away, and it doesn't happen without homesickness and a little hurting.
Though it has been difficult, it has also been easy. Every single time I look out at the ocean from the train to school, I smile. I grin like an idiot and could care less about what people might be thinking. The other day I was walking to the train station from babysitting, and I got one look at the ocean and just started crying. Happy tears. The whole way home.